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I can certainly think of a few less-than-appropriate things that could very well affect your career (if traced back to you), much like social media can.

Pretty sure I'm located in the city you're in.

He is eating a cheese toastie and drinking a cup of tea, most elegantly, with his little finger sticking out. Isn't it one thing, I say, for writers to do the book festival circuits, but to appear in the West End? He says: "Well, it's pointless to put out books and not tell people you have put out a book, right? He may be Bill Bryson, but more so, and with crazier hair. Does this mean it can never, ever be Dyson-ed, so to speak? "All children are curious," he replies, "and I don't think I was any more or less curious than the next child. And we had this big set of illustrated English history books, and I do remember liking those and spending many hours with them, but mostly I spent my time playing with Lego."Lego has yet to be toppled, hasn't it? "Lego went though a crisis and it had to transform itself from non-representational to representational. Kids require more of Lego today than they did in my day." You mean, we were happy just messing around with the bricks, but you now have to be able to build a Star Wars model?

My instinct tells me that I should avoid such apps in my new position, but I'd like to seek outside opinions.

I already have some of my own ideas, but what are some potential pitfalls of maintaining dating app profiles? Would anyone in my department or administration have a problem with me using them if they knew?

Otherwise, it's the tree falling in the forest." But you do realise, I tell him, because someone has to – Oh, why does it always have to be me? He says: "I guess not, no." This is a shame, as I long to see Malcolm Gladwell frolicking on a beach in a bikini, as snapped by the paps. I ask what his talk tonight, at Oxford's New Theatre, will be about. "Yes, so it's quite a different thing than the thing I grew up with." A worse thing? All children will apply a layer of imagination on whatever they are doing. "My loyalty lies with the Blackberry and will always do so," he says, "as I come from the town that invented it." So you haven't been tempted by an i Phone, then? I say I wouldn't want to have been the person who told Blackberry about the i Phone, just as I wouldn't have wanted to be the person who had to tell My Space about Facebook.

– that you'll never be a proper, full-blown celebrity until you start dating someone like, for example, Jennifer Aniston. I don't think she has a very pleasant life." Young man, I say. He says: "It's about two guys trying to come up with a drug for cancer." And will you be livening it up with... I don't think you change the fundamental nature of a child's brain just by changing the nature of the toy."The family moved to Elmira, a tiny community in rural Ontario famous for one thing and one thing only: it is the home of the Blackberry. He says mobile phones are a greater advancement than the internet.

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